Session 9
第九讲
Forgiving From the Heart
发自内心的饶恕
Focus Verse
重点经文
Matthew 18:34-35: In anger his master turned him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed. This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from your heart .
马太福音18章34-35 节：主人大怒， 我把他交给掌刑的，等他还清了所欠的债。 我的天父也要这样待你们，如果你们不从心里饶恕你们的弟兄。
Objective
目标
To recognize what forgiveness is and what is not, and to learn how to forgive from the heart.
知道什么是饶恕，什么不是，并且学习如何从内心深处饶恕。
Focus Truth
重点真理
In order to experience our freedom in Christ, we need to relate to other people in the same way that God relates to us--- on the basis of complete forgiveness and acceptance.
为了经历在基督里的自由，我们需要向上帝对待我们一样去对待别人---在完全的饶恕和接受的基础上相处。
Welcome
欢迎
Read Matthew 18: 21-25 or act it out using the script on page 72. Then try to put yourself in the place of one of the characters and say what strikes you most about the story.
阅读马太福音18章21-25节，或者用课文后面的剧本来表演。 试试扮演其中的一个角色，说说这个故事里什么内容最使你吃惊。
Worship
崇拜
Suggested theme: God’ forgiveness of us (Psalm 103:1-12; Hebrews 10:19-22).
建议的主题： 神对我们的饶恕。（诗篇103章1-12节，希伯来书10章19-22节）
Word
道
The Need to Forgive
饶恕的需要
“If you forgive anyone, I also forgive him. And what I have forgiven --- if there was anything to forgive--- I have forgiven in the sight of Christ for your sake, in order that Satan might not outwit us. For we are not unaware of his schemes” (2 Corinthians 2:10-11).
你们赦免谁，我也赦免谁，我若有所赦免的，是在基督面前为你们赦免的，免得撒旦趁机胜过我们（哥林多后书2章10-11 节）。
Nothing keeps you in bondage to the past more than an unwillingness to forgive. Nothing gives Satan greater opportunity to stop a church growing than roots of bitterness, the evidence of personal unforgiveness, and pride.
唯有不情愿饶恕能把人们束缚在过去的事件当中。没有什么比苦毒之根--个人的不饶恕和骄傲的证据---能给撒旦更大机会阻挡一个教会的成长。
It Is Required by God (Matthew 6:9-15)
饶恕是神的要求（马太福音6章9-15节）
We must learn to relate to others on the same basis that God relates to us.
我们必须学会向上帝待我们一样对待别人。
It Is Essential for Our Freedom (Matthew 18:21-35)
饶恕对我们自己的自由至关重要（马太福音18章21-35节）
We need to understand the extent of our own debt. Those who have been forgiven much love much. Those who have been forgiven little love little.
我们需要明白我们自己欠债的程度。得到饶恕多的也要饶恕别人多， 得到饶恕少的饶恕别人也少。
Pause for thought 1
思考问题1
Do you sometimes feel that your sins weren’t “ that bad” compared to others’?
How much have you been forgiven? Little or much?
你是否有时这么想：你的罪比起别人的还不算太糟?
你得到了多少饶恕，很少还是很多?
Repayment is impossible
Mercy is required
So that no advantage can be taken of you (2 Corinthians 2: 10-11)
还债是不可能的，怜悯是需要的，好不叫撒旦利用了你。（哥林多后书2 章10-11节）
What Does It Mean to Forgive From The Heart?
什么是从内心里饶恕?
Jesus warns that, if you do not forgive from your heart, you will suffer some kind of spiritual torment.
We recommend a formular: “ Lord, I choose to forgive (name)_______ For (specifically identify every remembered pain and hurt inflicted on you)________________, which made me feel____________”.
Forgiveness must be extended to others (Ephesians 4:31-32). However, the crisis is only between God and us.
耶稣提醒人们，如果你不从内心里饶恕人，你会受到某种灵魂的折磨。
我们建议这样一个饶恕的公式：“主，我选择饶恕（名字）-----------对我做的（列出你记忆中的具体的痛苦和伤害行为）----------------------，它们让我感到-----------------------------。
饶恕必须延及别人，（以弗所书 4章31-32节）。 但危机只发生在上帝和我们个人之间。
We Forgive to Stop the Pain
我们饶恕是为了停止痛苦
It is for our sake that we forgive. “But you don’t know how much that hurt me.” Don’t you see that they are still hurting you? How do you stop the pain? By forgiving.
We think that by forgiving someone we let them off the hook--- but by not forgiving them we stay hooked to the pain and the past.
正是为了自己，我们才饶恕人。“但你不知道这事给我多大伤害”。你没看见它还在继续对你造成伤害么? 你如何能停止痛苦? 通过饶恕人。
我们以为饶恕某人就是放走了某人，不再纠缠他---但是不饶恕他们我们自己就会依旧纠缠在过去的痛苦上。
Pause For Thought 2
思考问题２
Naturally speaking, none of us would want to remember past hurts. Is it necessary to do so in order genuinely to forgive? Do you agree that the crisis of forgiveness is between you and God rather than between you and the other person? Does it feel like that?
Who continues to feel pain when there is no forgiveness: the offender or the offended?
一般说来，我们都不想记住过去的伤害。真正的饶恕是不是有必要? 你是否同意，饶恕的危机是在你和上帝之间而不是在你和你所饶恕的那人之间? 你感觉是不是这样?
当不饶恕的时候，是谁继续感受到痛苦：伤害人者还是被伤害者?
What Is Forgiveness?
什么是饶恕?
Not Forgetting
不能忘记
You can’t get rid of a hurt simply by trying to forget it.
你不能单靠忘记它而摆脱掉伤害。
Not Tolerating Sin
不容忍罪
Not Seeking Revenge
不寻求报复
“ Do not take revenge, me friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: ‘It is mine to avenge; I will repay,’ says the Lord.” (Romans 12:19)
The justice is in the cross.
“亲爱的朋友，不要自己申冤，宁可让步，听凭主怒。因为经上记着：主说：申冤在我，我必报应”（罗马书12章19节）。
正义在十字架上。
Resolving To Live With the Consequences of Sin
决意忍受罪的后果
Everybody is living with the consequences of somebody else’s sin. The only real choice we have is to do that in the bondage of bitterness or the freedom of forgiveness.
Forgiveness is to set a captive free and then realize that you were the captive.
每个人都在忍受别人的罪的后果。我们能有的唯一真正的选择是在苦毒的束缚中忍受，还是在饶恕的自由中承受。 饶恕就是给一个痛苦的俘虏自由， 然后意识到你就是那俘虏。
Pause For Thought 3
思考问题3
How has this session changed your view of what forgiveness is or is not?
Next time someone offends you, will you be quicker to forgive? Why/why not?
这一课如何改变了你关于什么是饶恕什么不是的看法?
下一次某人伤害了你，你会很快地饶恕么? 为什么/为什么不?
Witness
见证
How might this question of forgiveness challenge someone who is not yet a Christian? Are there any ways you can demonstrate forgiveness to someone who does not yet know the Lord?
这个饶恕的问题对于还不是基督徒的人是怎样一个挑战? 你有没有什么方法可以用来对那些还不认识主的人说明如何饶恕?
Questions for Groups
给各组的问题
1. How much have you been forgiven? Little or much?
2. Do you sometimes feel that your sins weren’t “ that bad” compared to others?
3. Naturally speaking, none of us would want to remember past hurts. Is it necessary to do so in order to truly forgive?
4. Do you agree that the crisis of forgiveness is between you and God rather than between you and the other person? Does it feel like that?
5. Who continues to feel pain when there is no forgiveness: the offender or the offended?
6. How has this session changed your view of what forgiveness is or is not?
7. Next time someone offends you, will you be quicker to forgive? Why/why not?
1． 你得到了多少饶恕，很少还是很多?
2． 你是否有时认为，你的罪和别人比起来不怎么大?
3． 一般来说，我们都不想记住过去的伤害。 为了真正饶恕，是不是有必要回忆它?
4． 你是否认为饶恕的危机发生在你和上帝之间，而不是你和另外一个人之间? 感觉是否如此?
5． 当不饶恕时，谁继续感受伤害的痛苦，伤害人者还是被伤害者?
6． 这一课如何帮助你改变了关于什么是饶恕什么不是的看法?
7． 下一次某人伤害了你，你是否要更快地饶恕， 为什么/为什么不?
To take away
带回家的问题
Suggestions For Your Quiet Times This Week:
建议你在本周安静的时间作以下事情：
Ask the Holy Spirit to prepare your heart by leading you into all truth and starting to reveal to you the areas you will need to bring into the light when you go through “The Steps To Freedom In Christ.”
请求圣灵预备你得心，带领你进入真理，并在你照着“基督里的自由步骤”开始行动时，向你揭示你需要饶恕哪些事情。
Big Questions (to consider before the next session):
思考问题（下一课之前思考：
How you grown as a Christian as quick as you would have liked? If not, what do you think has got in the way?
你作为一个基督徒的成长是否向你想像的那般快? 如果不是，你认为是什么阻拦了成长?
Dramatisation of Matthew 18:21-25
马太福音的剧本 18 章21-25 节
Characters: Peter, Jesus, Servant1, Servant 2, Master
人物：彼得，耶稣，仆人1，仆人2，主人
Peter: Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?
主啊，我弟兄得罪我，我当饶恕他几次呢? 到七次可以吗?
Jesus: I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.
Therefore, the kingdom of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. As he began the settlement, a man who owned him ten thousand talents was brought to him. Since he was not able to pay, the master ordered that he and his wife and his children and all that he had be sold to repay the debt.
我告诉你，不是到七次，而是到七十个七次。 天国就好像一个王要和他仆人算账。 才开始算的时候，有人带了一个欠一千万银子的人来，因为他没有什么偿还之物，主人吩咐把他和他妻子儿女，都并一切所有的都卖了偿还。
The servant fell on his kneed before him.
那仆人就俯伏拜他。
Servant 1: Be patient with me, and I will pay back everything.
主啊，宽容我，将来我都要还清！
Jesus: The servant’s master took pity on him cancelled the debt and let him go. But when that servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owned him a hundred denarii. He grabbed him and began to choke him.
仆人的主人怜悯他，购销了他的欠债让他走了。 但当那个仆人出去后，他发现他的另一位仆人朋友欠他十两银子，便揪着他，掐住他的喉咙。
Servant 1: Pay back what you owe me!
你把所欠我的还我！
Jesus: His fellow servant fell to his knees and begged him:
他的仆人朋友跪下来求他
Servant 2: Be patient with me, and I will pay back.
宽容我吧，我会还清！
Jesus: But he refused. Instead, he went off and had the man thrown into prison until he could pay the debt. When the other servants saw what had happened, they were greatly distressed and went and told their master everything that had happened.
但是他拒绝宽容。相反，他竟去把他下到监狱里，等他还了所欠的债。其他仆人看见他所做的事，就甚忧愁，就把事情都告诉了主人。
Then the master called the servant
于是，主人又把第一位仆人叫了来。
Master: You wicked servant, I cancelled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. Shouldn’t you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?
你这恶奴才！我把你所欠的债都免了，因为你求我免。你不应当怜悯你的同伴，像我怜悯你吗?
Jesus: In anger his master turned him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed.
主人大怒，把他交给掌刑的，等他还清了所欠的债。
This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from your heart.
这就是我天父要对你们做的，除非你们从心里饶恕你们的弟兄。
Steps to Forgiveness
饶恕的步骤
1. Ask the Lord to Reveal to Your Mind the People You need to Forgive
1．求主向你的头脑揭示你需要饶恕哪些人
Make a list of everyone the Lord brings to your mind. Ask the Holy Spirit to guide you and write the names on a separate piece of paper. Even if you think there is no one, just ask God to bring up all the right names.
写一个清单包括主使你想到的每一个人。 请求圣灵引导你在一张纸上写下这些人的名字。 即使你觉得没有这么个人，也请求神让你想到这样一些人名。
The two most overlooked are yourself and God.
最经常被忽视的两个名字是你自己和神。
Forgiving yourself
饶恕你自己
Only God can forgive your sins --- but for many people, especially perfectionists, the hardest person for them to forgive is themselves, for letting themselves down. You are in effect accepting God’s forgiveness and refusing to listen to the devil’s accusations. Some people are really helped by being able to say, “I forgive myself for (list everything you hold against yourself), and let myself off my own hook.”
只有神能赦免罪-----但对对很多人来说，尤其是追求完美的人，最难让他们饶恕的是他们自己让自己失败的情况。 你实际上是在接受神的赦免，拒绝倾听撒旦的谴责。 有些人如果他们自己能说出来， “我原谅我自己（写下过去做过的一些你认为不能接受的事情），让我自己从自己的谴责中解脱出来”， 则对他们真很有帮助。
Forgiving God
饶恕上帝
Forgiving God is harder to understand because God has done nothing wrong. He always acted in your best interests.
Because you have not understood God’s larger plan, or because you have blamed God for something that other people or the devil have done, you may have felt that God has let you down.
饶恕上帝更难些，因为上帝没做什么错事。他总是按照你的最好利益行事。
因为你没有明白神的更大计划，或者因为你为了其他人或者魔鬼所做的事情而埋怨上帝，你可能感觉是神让你失望了。
Many people feel disappointed with God, even angry with Him, because He didn’t answer their prayer; He didn’t seem to be there for them. They cried out for help and nothing came. Usually they are embarrassed to admit it. But God knows anyway and He’s big enough to handle it.
很多人对神失望，甚至生气，因为他没有回应他们的祷告；他似乎没有帮助他们。他们求救，但是什么也没得着。 通常人们不敢承认， 觉得难为情。但上帝都知道，他有足够力量处理这种情况。
If you feel uncomfortable telling God you forgive Him, say something like, “I release the expectations, thoughts and feelings I have had against you.”
如果你觉得说出你饶恕神这样的话不舒服，你可以像这样来说:“我放弃这样的期待，想法，和对你敌意的感觉”。
2. Acknowledge the Hurt and the Hate
2．承认受到的伤害和心中的仇恨
Jesus instructed us to forgive from the heart. That’s much more than simply saying “ I forgive” and pretending we’ve dealt with it. To forgive from the heart we need to face the hurt and the hate. People try to suppress their emotional pain, but it is trying to surface so that we can let it go.
耶稣教导人们从心里饶恕。这比仅仅说出“我饶恕”并且假装我们已经处理好它的情况更要深入。 要从内心里饶恕，我们就要正视伤害和仇恨。人们试图压抑情绪的痛苦，但只有努力让它浮出水面，我们才能让它成为过去。
3. Understand the Significance of the Cross
3．明白十字架的深意
The cross is what makes forgiveness legally and morally right.
十字架使得饶恕合法并合乎道德正义
Jesus has already taken upon Himself your sin and the sins of the person who has hurt you. He died “once for all” (Hebrews 10:10). When your heart says, “It isn’t fair”, remember that the justice is in the cross.
耶稣已经把你的罪以及伤害你的人的罪担在了他的身上。 当你的心中说：“这不公平”时， 要记住，公义在十字架上。
4. Decide that You will Bear the Burden of Each Person’s Sin
4．决定你将担负每个人的罪。
You need to make a choice not to use the information you have against that person in the future.
“He who covers an offence promotes love, but whoever repeats the mater separates those friends.” (Proverbs 17:9).
将来不再用你所有的一些信息来谴责那个人。“遮掩人过的，寻求爱人，屡次挑错的，离间密友。”（箴言17章9节）
That doesn’t mean you never testify in a court of law --- However, you do it not in the bitterness of unforgiveness but having first forgiven from your heart.
这并不意味着你绝不在法庭上作证---而是，你作证也不是在不饶恕的苦毒之中作证，而是在心中首先饶恕了他。
5. Decide to Forgive
5．决定饶恕
Forgiveness is a crisis of the will. If you wait until you feel like doing it, you probably never will.
You may feel you can’t do it--- but would God really tell you to do something you couldn’t do? When he says that you can do all things in Christ, is that true or not? The reality is that you have a choice to make --- are you going to remain in bitterness, hooked to the past, giving the enemy an entrance to your mind; or are you going to get rid of it once and for all?
饶恕是一场意愿的危机。如果你想等到你觉得想这么做的时候，那你可能永远也不愿饶恕。
你可能感觉你做不到---但是，神会让你去做你真的不能做的事情么？当他告诉你说你在基督里万事都能做时，你信这是真的还是不信？现实是你必须做一个选择---你愿意还在苦毒当中，纠缠在过去，给敌人一个攻击你头脑的机会，还是你想一次永远地把它抛弃掉？
You choose to forgive, and in making that choice you are agreeing to live with sin and its consequences. You are choosing to let God be the avenger, and trust Him to bring justice in the end. You choose to take it to the cross and leave it there.
你选择饶恕，做这样选择的时候你同意承受罪的后果。你选择让神成为报复者，相信他将会最终带来公义。你选择把它交给十字架然后就放下它。
The gates of hell can’t prevail against the
地狱之门不会胜过神的国度。没有人能阻挡你成为神造你要成为的样子。只有你自己能够阻挡自己。你需要饶恕，仁慈，像基督爱你一样地爱别人。让那个人从你的生活中走出去，开始你的新生活， 在基督里自由地走开。
6. Take Your List to God
6．把你的名单交给上帝
To forgive from your heat, say:” Lord, I choose to forgive my father” and then specify what you are forgiving him for. Stay with the same person until you told the Lord every pain and hurt that has surfaced and be as specific as you can. It is then helpful to take it a step further and say how it made you feel: “ I choose to forgive my father for leaving us, which made me feel abandoned.”
要从你心里饶恕，就要说：“主啊，我选择饶恕我的父亲”并指出你饶恕他什么事情。先集中在一个人身上，告诉主你受到的每一个痛苦和伤害，尽量具体。 然后，再进一步，说出这些伤害带给你的感觉是什么：比如“我选择饶恕我的父亲，他离开了我们，使我感到被抛弃”。
Tears will often come at this point, but this is not about trying to get somebody to cry. It’s making sure that it’s as thorough as possible. One lady said, “I can’t forgive my mother. I hate her.” Having recognized her real feelings of hatred, now for the first time she probably could forgive--- if she didn’t admit that she hate her, she couldn’t forgive.
Pray as follows for each person you need to forgive: “Lord, I choose to forgive (name of the person) for (what they have done or failed to do), which made me feel (verbally tell the Lord every hurt and pain He brings to your mind)”.
此时常常会流泪， 但这个过程不是要让人哭泣。只是要确定尽可能地彻底。一位女士说，“我没法饶恕我母亲， 我恨她。” 由于承认她真实的仇恨感受，现在，她或许可以第一次开始饶恕她---如果她不承认她恨她，她也就不能饶恕她。
照下面的方法为你需要饶恕的每一个人祷告：“主，我选择饶恕（人名），饶恕她他对我作的事（做错的或者没做到的事）， 这使我感受痛苦（告诉主你想到的每一个伤害和痛苦）”。
Take careful note of what is said after the statement “which made me fell”. What often occurs is repeated patterns (eg “abandoned”, “stupid”, “dirty”). You can tear down those strongholds by saying, for example: “ I renounce the lie that I am stupid. I announce the truth that I have the mind of Christ” (1 Corinthians 2:16); “I renounce the lie that I am abandoned. I announce the truth that God has promised never to leave me nor forsake me”(Hebrews13:5). We will look at a specific strategy for doing this in Session 10. There is space on page 78 for you to write down what comes up.
注意在“这使我感到”这句话的后面要说的话。常常会出现重复的话语，（例如，“被抛弃”，“愚蠢”，“肮脏”）。拆除这些顽固堡垒你可以说这样一些话：比如：“我拒绝说我愚蠢的谎言。我宣告真理是我有基督的心”（哥林多后书 2 章16 节）。“我拒绝关于我被抛弃的谎言，我宣告真理是，神已经应许绝不离开我抛弃我 （希伯来书13 章5 节）。我们将在第十课里探讨具体的方式。本课最后一页上有空白，供你写下想到的话。
7. Destroy the List
7． 撕掉清单
You are now free from those people and those events in the past.
你现在从过去那些人和事的束缚当中解脱了。
8. Do not Expect that Your Decision to Forgive Will Result in Major Changes in Others
8。不要指望你饶恕他人的决定必然会使他人发生巨大变化
Forgiving others is primarily about you and your relationship with God. Pray for those you have forgiven, that they may be blessed and that they too may find the freedom of forgiveness( see Matthew 5:44; 2 Corinthians 2:7).
饶恕他人主要是你和上帝之间关系的事情。为那些你所饶恕的人祈求，好使他们得到恩惠，也使他们找到饶恕的自由 （见马太福音5 章44 节，哥林多后书2章7节）。
9. Try to Understand the People You Have Forgiven
9．试着去理解你所饶恕的人
You may find it helpful to understand some of what the other person was going through, but don’t go so far as to rationalize away the sin—this is not about saying “It didn’t matter”, because it did.
你会发现了解他人经历过的挣扎对你很有帮助，但是不要走的太远为罪找理由---这不是说“没有关系”，因为关系是有的。
10. Expect Positive Results of Forgiveness in You
10．期待饶恕在你心中产生的正面效果
Forgiveness is not about feeling good; it’s about being free. However, good feelings will follow eventually. You will need to concentrate on renewing your mind so that negative ways of thinking are replaced by the truth.
饶恕不是为了感觉好，而是为了获得自由。然而，好的感觉终会自然随之而来。你需要注意更新你的心智，让负面思想被真理取代。
11. Thank God for the Lessons You have Learned and the Maturity You have Gained
11．为你学到的真理和你获得的成熟感谢神
You are now free to move on and grow as a Christian.
你现在可以自由前行， 做一个生命成长的基督徒了。
12. Accept Your Part of the Blame for the Offences you Suffered
12 对于你过去经受的得罪，接受你该受的那部分责备
Confess your part in any sin and know that you are forgiven. If you realize that someone has something against you, go to them and be reconciled. Confess your own wrongdoing rather than bringing up anything they did.
坦承你所犯的罪，悔改，并知道你得到了饶恕。如果你意识到某些人有某些事得罪了你，去接触他们，与他们和好。 坦承你做错的事，而不是指责他们的行为。
Uncovering Strongholds
发现顽疾
As you go through Step 3(Forgiveness) of the Steps to Freedom In Christ, you are encouraged to pray as follows for each person you need to forgive: “Lord, I choose to forgive (name of the person) for ( what they did or failed to do), which made me feel (Verbally tell the Lord every hurt and pain He brings to your mind)”.
当你进行“基督里的自由步骤”中第三个步骤时，鼓励你按如下的方式为你需要饶恕的每个人祈求：“主，我选择饶恕（名字），饶恕他们（做错或未做的事情），这使我感受到（告诉主你心中想到的每一个伤害和痛苦）”。
Use this page to record the things you say after “which made me feel”.
用这一页记载你在“这使我感受到”后面填写的内容。
Some of them will reveal mental strongholds that you can work on.
其中一些可能揭示出你头脑中的一些顽疾，你需要继续处理（见第六，七，八课内容）。
Session 10 will equip you with a strategy for this.
第十课将会给你一些方法处理这些问题。
